What type of coffee are you?


You are a double espresso at 3 AM.
You are a double espresso at three AM.

You are the tortured, nail-biting essence of
coffee. You see visions. You could change the
world if only you were up at the same time as
everyone else. You have created a programming
language that throws errors if the code is not
written in iambic pentameter, and you are
infuriated by the typos in the new edition of
Ulysses. You practice sarcasm as a
form of tantric sex, and your cats have
doctorates. You believe in virgin sacrifice in
a good cause.

What kind of coffee are you?
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2 thoughts on “What type of coffee are you?”

  1. These coffee types are way too accurate – tortured, nail-biting, visionary, virgin sacrifices… sums you up perfectly really doesn’t it! Mine was also very accurate though – “You forget small details such as your telephone number and the names of your children.” Uncanny.

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